Personal stuff, so just ignore if you want.
I had always wanted an apology, an acknowledgement of the pain he had caused me. But now that I have it, I realize nothing has really changed. I said I miss him, but I realize that’s not true. I miss having a best friend. I miss having someone to hang out with, someone who would be there for me and open up to. But I never had that with him. We had fun, but it wasn’t genuine friendship. We were close, but I never really knew him. I never could have imagined the person I knew treating me the way he did. And all he ever did was lie to me. I realize that I want what we had back, but not with him. And why now? Why message me after all this time? Just to open up old wounds? I know it isn’t to make me feel better about anything. I regret even replying to his message. I’ll keep the few happy memories he gave me, but that’s all they are: memories. It’s not that I hate him, I just can’t trust him. And I won’t hurt myself again just for his sake.